Whatever Wednesday: My fabulous new anti-oxidant diet


Pssst. Have you heard? There’s a new diet in town and MAN is it sexay!

One part yellow kernel to one part cocoa bean.

Whooooo-weeeeeeee!

I cain’t wait to get this one going!

"Caramel Popcorn drizzled with chocolate" by EdwardKimkuk @flickr. Original photo sourced here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/woodwood/4835402465/

I’m gonna eat Chocolate Popcorn for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and midnight snack. I may even adopt the Hobbit habit of Second Breakfast. And Elevensees.

Hell. Tea Time? All over it. Screw cucumber sandwiches. Gimme a giant ball of popcorn slathered in rich dark chocolate please.

Or if I want to be more ladylike, two pieces of popcorn with an M&M smooshed in between them. It’s practically a Ménage à trois of health!

Nom.

I’ll be healthy and svelte in no time, right? Right?

I wonder if I can scrounge up a prescription for Ambien. You know, for mindless trips to the kitchen in the middle of the night. Or wait, is that Lunesta? I can’t remember. I’m too busy day dreaming about a pool full of puffy popcorn coated in a lusty sheen of chocolate. Mmmmmm.

Paula Deen’s got nothing on this new diet. Butter Schmutter, y’all.

Chocolate makes you thinner.

Popcorn is packed with anti-oxidants. Just like chocolate. Which, you know, makes you thinner.

It’s a win-win situation, right?

Especially for Oral-B. Because you know, kernels.

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4 thoughts on “Whatever Wednesday: My fabulous new anti-oxidant diet

  1. Oh, now you’re talking my language, mama. I’m the kind of girl who goes to the movies and buys M&Ms to toss into my over-buttered popcorn. So I’m a shoe-in for the weight loss program you mention here.

    Oh — wait. It’s NOT a weight loss program? Dang you for getting my hopes up so high. ;)

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