About ksluiter

Just a small town girl...wait no, that is a Journey song. Although I do live in a small town. I am a wife, a mother, a teacher, and a writer. We have joys and we have struggles. Just like you.

Guest post by @ksluiter: and now my depression is affecting those not yet born…


Hi.

It’s me, Katie, from Sluiter Nation.

I have a problem.

I’m not pregnant.

Sigh.  Yes, this is a problem.

Let me back up the truck for those of you who don’t know my back story.

I have an almost-two-year-old son, Eddie. Three months before Eddie turned a year, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression and anxiety.

I have been fighting this damn disease ever since March of 2010.

The therapist I see and my general practitioner both agree that at this point?  Because I had a pre-existing anxiety disorder?  I can likely drop the “postpartum” part of the label.

I suffer from depression and anxiety.

And I am trying to get pregnant.

Also?  My husband suffers from extremely mild depression.

up until very recently we were both medicated.

Do you know how hard it is to conceive when both players are on drugs?  The med that my hubs was on?  Decreased sperm count and made it difficult to…um…finish.

You can’t get a baby without the finish, people.

My meds kill libido.

So let’s recap.  One of us doesn’t want it and the other can’t complete the task anyway.

And here we are…three months later…no baby.

Not surprising, but still frustrating.

So now the hubs is off his meds.  And he is all raring to go…all the time.

Yay for lots of baby making, right?

Wrong.

It’s still hard for me to want to.  I mean, I so want to.  I want another baby so bad it’s hard to be excited when others are blessed with little lives.  And I want to be close with my husband.

But…stupid medication.  stupid depression sucking the joy out of my sex life.  stupid anxiety about what my body looks like.

People keep telling me to relax.

How do I do that?    How do I enjoy sexy time more than only a couple times…a  month?  Because it’s going to take more than that for us to make a human.

I am so tired of this stupid depression and anxiety taking over every aspect of my life.

It stole so much precious time away from my son and my husband.  And now I feel like it’s taking time away from my not-yet-created baby.

Rally for Mental Health


Hi everyone!

I guess I should introduce myself.

Some of you may know me, to the rest of you?  You are probably craning your necks, trying to see around me to see if Lauren is back there.

She is not.  She has a lot of stuff going on and asked for a wee bit of help around these parts.

So….

My name is Kate and I blog over at Sluiter Nation about being a wife, a full-time working mom to an almost-two-year-old, and I am a survivor of PPD/A among other things.

The first time I posted about my PPD, I was nervous.  I didn’t know if anyone would read or care or judge or what.

I got a bunch of comments I didn’t expect.  And some people didn’t understand, so I posted about what it’s not.

Very soon after this I found Lauren and this blog and #PPDChat.

And then I found the 2010 Mother’s Day Rally over at Postpartum Progress.  It saved my life.

Shortly after, someone I had just met through all the PPD stuff here and there and on twitter, asked me to be part of her May is Mental Health Month Rally for 2010.

A year later, Miranda is probably one of my best friends on the interwebs and I am POSITIVE we will be besties when we finally meet in real life too.

This year she is running another Rally for Mental Health Month on her blog, Not Super…Just Mom.

Most posters are women (and men!) who have dealt with PPD/A and have come out on the other side.

These are wonderful stories, albeit difficult for some to tell.

They are filled with hope and encouragement.

And as my first post here?  I encourage YOU to go fill yourself with hope.  Every day this week.

Start here with her introductory post.

And enjoy.